By Gerald G. May
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Extra resources for Addiction and Grace: Love and Spirituality in the Healing of Addictions (Plus)
Moments of peaceful openness and self-reflection, which may have seemed so pleasant in the past, are now actively avoided. Prayer, meditation, and simple times of quiet relaxation are either discontinued or filled with activities that will occupy attention. ” I know my own daily practice of prayer and meditation is not easy. One reason is that this practice opens my awareness to things about myself that I would rather not be conscious of. In many instances, these awarenesses have to do with my addictions: how attached I am to certain petty concerns and competitions, how worried I am about truly insignificant things, how important my selfish ego is to me.
One reason is that this practice opens my awareness to things about myself that I would rather not be conscious of. In many instances, these awarenesses have to do with my addictions: how attached I am to certain petty concerns and competitions, how worried I am about truly insignificant things, how important my selfish ego is to me. So I find myself resisting settling down to pray, or I fill my meditation time with images or music or words—anything that will keep me from simply being present and awake before God.
We may manipulate or be manipulated. Our sense of personal worth, goodness, or lovability may become contingent on the approval of others. It is likely that addiction is present when such things happen, because freedom is compromised. Our personal worth and value, our capacity to love and be loved, and our ultimate care and protection are all things that have been given to us by God as our birthrights. 5 34 / Addiction and Grace Everyone in our culture seeks some kind of security within the realms of possessions, power, and relationships.